Tag Archives: struggle

The Jango within my mind

Why is it that I don’t love you anymore? How do you upset me so?
I feel that even though we are polarized opposites that should attract, I feel repelled like we are similar electric charges.
Those days when it rained and you held me for warmth don’t feel the same, now I feel stuck in a rut.
Unknown to my own feelings at the moment.
It’s hard for me to understand myself at this point, it’s as if my world is tipping over into oblivion even things seem to shine bright momentarily.
I’ve become intrigued with others that are not you, who are vibrant and eccentric. Through your changes and distrust in me, I feel cornered now. You and I don’t sync as we use to, for now you are in the defensive with any and everything. I knew we wouldn’t be the same after you lost your trust in me, yet you still decided to prolong this and it has only caused you more suffering, knowing this information, I feel I am not the right person for you. As your lover and best friend, this has become the only conclusion I have at the moment and I don’t know what to do. I want you to completely let go and forgive me…alas I know it won’t happen even though you have made those claims before. We try to bandage out wounds, yet we forgot to sterilize them before concealing them, now they have created a disease that seems untreatable at the moment…what are we to do from here?

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Rush

Do you not feel it?
I know I do, it is giving me such a high
Adrenaline pumping, body begins to become numb
Time doesn’t seem to heal these wounds
Scars from a different animal, a malevolent beast
Leviathan if you will, but I digress
This high of mine
Is something that is welcoming to me
When all hope is lost
Unable to communicate with the world
No one can hear you in here
“It is safe…” Damn, that voice is enticing
Accompanied by this container of these small circular consumables
Makes me lean backwards and look at the sky above
Not able to see its beauty due to the cage of the ceiling.
Thoughts overflowing, represented by the wrath of an erupted volcano
Yet such powerful force cannot be contained for long
Unless you are ready to deal with the repercussions of high scaled magnitude, leaving you uneasy at the end
Nothing more but you, that bottle, and the empty room that is full.
Sitting blankly…those will be your salvation
To keep you levelheaded but its a temporary rush…..

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